Bizarre Unlockables

The PC-Engine’s Super CD had several hardware revisions in its lifetime, and games were released in various formats. In order for the PC-Engine to recognize these formats, the proper “System Card” was required. If players attempted to play a Super CD game that required a newer System Card than the one that was inserted, they were typically greeted a custom message informing them that they needed an upgrade. Dracula-X took things a step further by greeting players with entire stage to play through. This hidden level was called “Stage X” and seemed as though it was intended for a very young audience. Richter Belmont was given a comical makeover for this stage and the visuals were extremely simplistic. After whipping their way to the end of the brief stage, players were finally greeted with a message informing them that they’d need a newer System Card.

By completing Contra: Shattered Soldier with an “S” ranking, players can unlock a hilarious movie in which Bill Rizer battles an ominous figure that bears a striking resemblance to Sparkster from Rocket Knight Adventures. As the battle rages on, the programmers provide sound effects for the firing guns and explosions. It wouldn’t be too much of a stretch to suggest that the programmers clearly went out of their way to sound as idiotic as they possibly could. The scene could perhaps be compared to the ridiculous shark scene from the film, Strange Wilderness. It’s difficult to put in words, and you really have to see it for yourself in order to understand. Contra: Shattered Soldier is a difficult game to begin with, but getting an “S” rating is nearly impossible. It’s pretty sinister to make players go through all that trouble just to hear a bunch of programmers acting like morons, but it’s rewarding at the same time.

Nathan Drake is often seen as a male version of Lara Croft, and he clearly drew inspiration from Indiana Jones. While searching for treasure, Nate finds himself swinging from ropes, climbing ledges, and exploring ancient ruins. The harsh environments in Uncharted often place him in situations that require acrobatic movements and incredible stamina. Obviously, Nate’s adventure requires him to be in top physical condition. This, above all, is what makes Doughnut Drake so completely absurd. By earning 1000 award points in the game, players unlock a new skin for Nathan that makes him appear obese. Despite his obesity, there are no discernible differences between Doughnut Drake and his thinner self with respect to their abilities. The developers of Uncharted had always intended for Nathan Drake to be an “everyman” of sorts. Ironically, Doughnut Drake is a much more realistic depiction of a typical American.

Rogue Squadron gave players the ability to unlock a number of classic Star Wars ships, including the Millennium Falcon and Luke Skywalker’s T-16 Skyhopper. One of the most noteworthy hidden ships was the Naboo Starfighter from Episode I. The inclusion of this ship was particularly surprising given the fact that Rogue Squadron hit store shelves six months before Episode I premiered on the big screen. While the Naboo Starfighter was an unexpected addition, it still made sense for the ship to be in the game. There was one hidden vehicle that seemed completely out of place. By entering the correct password, players could unlock a flying model of a 1969 Buick Electra 225. This vehicle has no relevance to the Star Wars universe, and was simply based on a car owned by the game’s sound designer, Rudolph Stember. People were expecting a lot from Rogue Squadron, but I don’t think anyone could have anticipated that they’d have an opportunity to take down swarms of enemy TIE fighters with a flying Buick.

One of the main reasons why Wave Race 64 was so successful was because of its realism. The game’s water effects were revolutionary in 1996, and the physics associated with the waves was nothing short of remarkable. Players needed to understand the movement of the water if they wanted to launch themselves off of waves, dive under barricades, or avoid floating obstacles. The game even featured real-life Kawasaki watercrafts, which added to the realism. Thankfully, Wave Race 64 didn’t take itself too seriously. By racing through all the rings and performing all of the game’s stunts in the aptly-named Dolphin Park, players were given the opportunity to dock their Jet Skis and ride a dolphin instead. The dolphin handles exactly like the Jet Skis do, but a watercraft racer straddling a dolphin and jumping him off a ramp is quite the sight to behold.

The Hadoken is a special attack from the Street Fighter series that lets fighters create powerful surges of energy with their hands. The move can also be unlocked in Mega Man X, providing players are willing to jump through enough hoops. Firstly, players have to acquire all the weapons and armor. Secondly, they need all four sub-tanks and must have their lives maxed out. Once these requirements are met, players then have to play through the same level five times in a row without using any special weapons. On the fifth time, players are finally greeted by a holographic Dr. Light who presents X with new special attack inspired by the Street Fighter series. The whole process sounds like one of those ridiculous urban myths that kids used to spread during recess, and when Electronic Gaming Monthly published the trick in their April, 1994 issue, many readers were convinced that it was just another elaborate April fool’s joke. Rest assured, the trick actually works! Initially, it doesn’t seem make a lot of sense for Mega Man X to throw Hadokens when he has a perfectly good arm canon at his disposal. The fact that the fireball can only be used when X has full energy makes it seem even more impractical. That said, the Hadoken is extremely powerful and can kill nearly enemy in the game with a single hit. Even disregarding the sheer power of the move, it’s still worth using just to hear X scream “Hadoken” in a high-pitched voice.

Fighters Megamix is an ambitious fighting game that features characters from numerous Sega franchises. Virtua Fighter, Fighting Vipers, and Virtua Cop 2 among others are all represented in the game. The concept of taking styles from different games and mixing them together wasn’t exactly a new idea, but Fighters Megamix had a ridiculous sense of humor that really set itself apart from similar games. The best example of this sense of humor is the inclusion of Hornet as a secret character. Hornet is the Number 41 car from Daytona USA. (That’s right. He’s a car who somehow finds himself in a fighting tournament.) Hornet stands on his back wheels during battle and uses his front wheels as makeshift fists. If Hornet takes too much damage, his body panels can be knocked off, revealing his chassis and engine parts underneath. There aren’t too many fighting games that feature race cars as playable characters.

NBA Jam was never supposed to be realistic, but it’s hidden characters made the game even seem more ridiculous. By entering the correct initials and button sequences, players were able to play as a vast array of secret characters that included team mascots and game developers. Some of the secret characters were more outlandish than others, but none seemed more out of place than Bill Clinton and Al Gore. Keep in mind that Clinton and Gore were the residing President and Vice President respectively, so to see them appear in a video game was quite surprising. When NBA Jam: Tournament Edition was released the following year, Bill Clinton was once again featured as a secret character. Al Gore, however, was replaced by then-First Lady Hillary Clinton. Seeing the Clintons playing professional basketball alongside NBA players is completely absurd, to say the least. Hillary and basketball go together about as well as Barack Obama and bowling do. Other secret characters included Prince Charles and Will Smith. Where else could you see the Prince of Wales and the Fresh Prince of Bel-Air playing basketball together?

The God of War series is known for incredible visuals, tight gameplay, and smart level design. The only weakness the series has is that it takes itself a little too seriously at times. The games feature sex, violence, and a bald protagonist – so it basically meets all the requirements that hardcore gamers look for. The games are clearly aimed at testosterone-fueled gamers, and the revenge-driven plot and brooding lead character don’t exactly allow much room for lighthearted content. This is why the unlockable “Cod of War” outfit from God of War II was so surprising. The game has several alternate costumes to unlock, but most of them relate to mythology or warfare. The Cod of War costume, in contrast, is completely out of place. Upon unlocking the fish costume, the game explains that “Kratos’ life has always been an upstream battle.” While wearing the outfit, Kratos’ “Blades of Athena” are replaced by fishhooks. The Cod of War costume can be unlocked by simply finishing the game on any difficulty setting.

One of the most notable aspects of Resident Evil 2 was its scenario system. The game featured two playable characters, and each were given two scenarios to complete. Upon completing the main scenarios, players could unlock a bonus mission called “The 4th Survivor” which followed a mercenary named HUNK on his journey to escape from the zombie infested Raccoon City. Also, by completing the normal scenarios six different times, players could unlock a modified version of HUNK’s mission in which HUNK is replaced by Tofu. True to his name, Tofu is a human-sized block of tofu. He doesn’t have any facial features, nor does he have any arms or legs. He is only able to hold onto a knife due to his limbless, Rayman-esque hands. Tofu was initially used by Capcom as a means of testing the collision detection, but he seems completely out of place in the finished game. I’m still trying understand why zombies would want to eat tofu in the first place.