Chainmail Bikinis
Top 10 Best Video Game Chainmail Bikinis of All Time!
For the purpose of this list, chainmail bikini is a generic term used to describe the skimpy outfits that fictional women wear in lieu of proper armor. These outfits typically cover up the x-rated parts, but they provide very little coverage anywhere else. In other words, the attire accentuates a characters’ T&A rather than protecting it. This countdown isn’t merely a list of scantily clad characters, however. Rather, this is a list of scantily clad characters who are in situations where they have no reason to be scantily clad. If your enemies have weapons, you should take the appropriate measures to protect yourself. If your allies are wearing protective clothing, then you probably should be too. Chainmail bikinis would be impractical in the real world, but there’s no mystery as to why they’re so prevalent in the gaming sphere. Incidentally, there’s a pretty big overlap between people who like video games and people who appreciate the female form. A chainmail bikini would offer very little in the name of protection, but we all know that that’s not their real purpose. Now let’s all take a look at the most impractically sexy outfits in gaming.
Examples: Princess Leia, Red Sonja, Rebecca of Dressrosa
10
Shantae
Shantae Series
Most of Shantae’s outfits showcase her midriff and highlight her form, but her golden dancer outfit is especially well-suited for this list. The outfit is an intentional reference to the iconic metal bikini that Princess Leia was forced to wear in Return of the Jedi – arguably the most famous example of this trope in any medium. Shantae herself refers to the outfit as “a metal bathing suit” and notes that she’s “dressed like a space princess” after she puts it on. Shantae wears a couple variants of the dancer outfit, and the Pirate Queen Risky Boots is even forced to wear one after she’s kidnapped in Shantae and the Pirate’s Curse. Risky Boots doesn’t seem to like the outfit much, but I think it looks good on her. The metal dancer outfit would be rated much higher on this list if it had been the default attire.
9
Rachel
Ninja Gaiden Series
Rachel is a tragic heroine who is afflicted with a blood curse that turns humans into supernatural fiends. The aforementioned curse also bestows her with superhuman strength that allows her to wield massive war hammers. (It’s somehow appropriate for a top-heavy babe to arm herself with top-heavy weapons.) Many of the characters in Ninja Gaiden are covered from head to toe, so Rachel stands out in a sea of ninjas. Her curvaceous figure would be hard to miss in any situation, and this is especially true when she’s wearing S&M gear that leaves most of her skin exposed. Rachel’s twin sister has already succumbed to the curse, so she is operating under the assumption that she’ll be transformed into an abomination too. I can understand why she’d feel compelled to show of her body when she still has it.
8
Cloud of Darkness
Final Fantasy III
This list is dominated by women, but Cloud of Darkness is a genderless monster that merely takes the form of a shapely woman. An eternal being that exists outside the confides of time, its ultimate plan is to return the world to a state of nothingness. It apparently wants to return its outfit to a state of nothingness as well. Most of the ladies on this list are underdressed, but this claim cannot be leveled against Cloud of Darkness. Clothing is of no consequence to apparitions, so the fact that it wears anything at all is a classy move on its part. Cloud of Darkness doesn’t show up until the end of Final Fantasy III and its personality is not fully explored, but the outfit leaves little to the imagination. The barely-there bikini is almost enough to distract us from the weird tentacle monsters that are wrapped around its body.
7
The Amazon
Dragon’s Crown
The Amazon is a dauntless warrior who is defined by immense physical strength. She wields massive weapons and will happily mow down anyone in her path, but her defense is relatively weak. As impressive as her muscles are, they can’t deflect weapons. It would be easy to write off the Amazon’s clothing as unwise or misguided, but it can’t be easy to buy clothes when you have a body like hers. It’s not like she’d fit into a standard suit of armor. She could probably have something custom made, but that solution would present its own set of challenges. You’d need an inordinate amount of material to cover up her gargantuan thighs, and you have to wonder if the added weight would slow her down too much. Her armored bikini is a couple sizes too small as it is, and it wouldn’t be easy to for her to find something more substantial.
6
Castanic Women
TERA
Many of the races in TERA are inclined to wear revealing clothing, and this is especially true of the Castanics. They are known for their fierce independence, and their fashion reflects their liberated way of life. The most worthy Castanic warriors arm themselves with weapons that were handed down from the matriarchal order of valkyries, but their armor doesn’t provide a lot of protection. Their fights are often over before they start, however, since Castanics are notoriously opportunistic and short-tempered. Outside of battle, Castanics are cunning negotiators who always strive to find a way to come out on top. It’s safe to assume their lascivious outfits help bolster their capacity to bargain. It might seem unfair to include an entire race as an entry on this list, but Castanic fashion is defined by eroticism.
5
Aphrodite
SMITE
The cast of SMITE is comprised entirely of deities from various mythologies and religions. These all-powerful beings have all sorts of supernatural abilities at their command, but none can match the radiance and glory of the Goddess of Beauty. She may not be the strongest deity, but one look at Aphrodite can inspire tears, jealousy, and love. Many of the goddesses in the game look like they are appropriately dressed for battle, but this doesn’t invalidate Aphrodite’s chosen attire. Her exposed skin makes her susceptible to swords and arrows, but her beauty has the potential to stop wars altogether. One kiss from her can make her opponents forget why they were even fighting in the first place. Aphrodite basically weaponizes her sex appeal, so her skimpy outfits are actually more practical than armor.
4
Fran
Final Fantasy XII
Fran’s reclusive rabbit-like race is defined by a philosophy of isolation. In the name of personal freedom, she left her home and put the past behind her. Her skimpy clothing was habitual in the sheltered, all-female environment she grew up in, but it’s guaranteed to turn heads in the outside world. It’s not like she needs the extra attention. The girl is built like a runway model, after all, and her rabbit ears and stilettos make her tower over most of her castmates. The fact that her armor barely covers her body makes it even harder to ignore the statuesque stunner. Fran is known as the master of weapons, but she doesn’t seem overly concerned with defending herself from other people’s weapons. She always carries herself with grace, so her clothing feels like an extension of her independence rather than an expression of sleaziness.
3
Princess Solange
Code of Princess
Solange Blanchefleur de Lux is the Princess of DeLuxia and the guardian of the sacred blade, DeLuxcalibur. She’s a kind-hearted gal with a strong sense of responsibility, and she vows to protect her kingdom and save the world. Although she takes her duties very seriously, Solange is defined more by her looks than her passion. (IGN spent the first two paragraphs of their Code of Princess review talking about her revealing clothing.) Aside from her heavily-armored arms and neckline, Solange is dangerously close to being naked. Her breasts are barely covered, and there’s no way her tiny panties would stay up if it wasn’t for her elaborate belt. Her outfit is anything but practical, but Solange insists that’s its a royal crown and is quick to anger when anyone makes fun of her impeccable fashion sense.
2
Shahdee
Prince of Persia: Warrior Within
Imagine, if you will, a young woman seductively walking up the stairs while the camera focuses firmly on her ass for the entire duration. After reaching the top of the stairs, the temptress walks between two rows of testosterone-fueled men who are ready to do whatever she asks of them. I’ve just described the opening moments of a typical gangbang scene, but it happens to mirror Shahdee’s introduction in Prince of Persia: Warrior Within. Needless to say, her slinky outfit is a perfect fit for her Brazzers-esque intro. As a servant to the Empress of Time, Shahdee leads a group of sand demons in an effort to stop the Prince from reaching the Island of Time. Cruel, merciless, and spiteful, Shahdee was created in the Empress’ own image. She eventually grows to hate her maker, but I feel nothing but gratitude for her creator.
1
Ivy Valentine
SoulCalibur Series
The SoulCalibur series is known for its sex appeal, and none of its characters plays it up more than Ivy Valentine. If her dominatrix attire was any skimpier, they’d have to raise the age rating. Her racy outfit may not be the most practical choice for battle, but it certainly helps her get noticed. Ivy was first seen in the original SoulCalibur and has been a staple in the series ever since. Her clothing doesn’t leave a lot to the imagination, and it wouldn’t be much of a leap to suggest that her voluptuous figure has contributed to her popularity. You can’t make assumptions about her personality based on her appearance, however. Ivy has cursed blood running through her veins, so she chooses to remain celibate. It would seem that Ivy isn’t nearly as sex-crazed as some of her fans are.
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