Character Theme Songs

Like many others, my initial reaction to the DK Rap was one of shock and awe. The cringe-worthy opening to Donkey Kong 64 was obviously aimed at young children, and it’s fair to say that the game did not make a good first impression. Despite my initial distaste for the song, I found myself watching the entire intro every time I played the game. Its lyrics are childish, but the song has purpose. Donkey Kong 64 introduced a handful of new characters and abilities, and the DK Rap does a great job of relaying them to the player. I won’t go so far as to describe it as a great song, but I do catch myself singing it from time to time. Characters who would have otherwise been completely forgettable now have a permanent place in my brain as a result of the DK Rap. Composer Grant Kirkhope received a lot of flak for the song, but he never intended for it to be anything other than a joke.

Mysterious Destiny is the fighting theme in Bayonetta and also serves as the main theme for everyone’s favorite witch. The song was performed by Helena Noguerra and composed by Masami Ueda, and its lyrics focus on Bayonetta’s fighting style and dance-like movements. The song also carries emotional weight, as it delves into her enigmatic personality and touches on the sadness she feels as the result of her amnesia. The lyrics read like a motivational pick-me-up directed at Bayonetta herself, and they effectively provide encouragement to the player by proxy. A sexy woman like Bayonetta deserves an equally sexy theme song, and Mysterious Destiny certainly fits the bill. Alternate versions of the song can be heard in Anarchy Reigns, Super Smash Bros., and the animated movie, Bayonetta: Bloody Fate. The Bayonetta soundtrack is amazing from beginning to end, but Mysterious Destiny is especially catchy.

Margaret Moonlight is a loligoth assassin who could be likened to the Grim Reaper. Renowned voice actress Tara Strong brings her to life with the perfect amount of enthusiasm and sass. She arms herself with a pair of scythes that double as sniper rifles, but she’s most memorable for her singing. Her song (called Philistine) is said to be the last thing her victims hear before they die, but the lyrics appear to be tailored specifically to whomever she is fighting against. In the case of Travis Touchdown, she mocks him for his false sense of nobility and his Otaku perversions. (In that regard, the lyrics are also tailored to many of the game’s fans.) After Margaret is impaled by Travis, she uses her last bit of energy to ask him if he’s memorized the lyrics to her song. The theme is certainly catchy, and the remixed version (included in the Japanese and European versions of the game) is equally infectious.

Sonic Adventure 2 was a bit of a mixed bag. The plot was horrible, the camera was atrocious, and the introduction of Shadow the Hedgehog was entirely unnecessary. On the other hand, the game was specifically designed to be more action-based than its immediate predecessor, and the gameplay was generally faster and more intense. The game definitely starts off on a high note and sees our favorite blue hedgehog snowboarding through the streets of a city, grinding on rails, and escaping from a runaway semi truck. Sonic’s positivity, daredevil personality, and sense of adventure are all highlighted in the song, and a heavy emphasis is placed on his ability to travel at supersonic speeds. Escape from the City matches the tempo and energy of the stage to a tee, but its legacy extends far beyond Sonic Adventure 2. Remixed versions of the song can be heard in Sonic Generations, Super Smash Bros., and a handful of other games.

Easily the most beautiful song on this list, Quiet’s Theme was composed by Akihiro Honda and written by Ludvig Forrsell. The vocals are provided by Stefanie Joosten (who also plays the role of Quiet in the game), and a cover version by Donna Burke was featured on the album, Metal Gear Solid ~Vocal Tracks~. The melancholy lyrics relay what Quiet was unable to say during the game, and they are loaded with thinly-veiled metaphors that relate directly to the game’s plot. Bars from the song were heard during the launch trailer for Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain and Quiet hums the song periodically throughout the game, but it was a real treat to finally hear her singing voice. Quiet’s skimpy clothing made her the target of unfair criticism, but she’s one of the most complex characters in the Metal Gear franchise. Her theme reminds us of the emotional gravity her character has.

An instrumental version of Blue Mary’s Blues was used as Mary’s character theme in King of Fighters ’97, but it was first shown to players as a bonus music video in Real Bout Fatal Fury Special. I’ve always been fond of Dragon Ball Z and boobs, so you can understand why I would be drawn to someone who looks like a bustier version of Android 18. There are two obvious reasons why Blue Mary is so popular, but there is more depth to her character than meets the eye. Blue Mary’s Blues is both somber and upbeat, and it provides some insight into Mary’s personality. Its lyrics speak to the dried up pain within her heart and explains how she chases cheap thrills and seeks out danger in an effort to ease her sorrow. It’s unfortunate that the lyrics are in Japanese, but the jazzy riffs are downright sexy regardless of what language you speak.

Double Dragon Neon excels as both a remake of the original Double Dragon and as a love letter to the ’80s as a whole, and this is especially true of the soundtrack. Dared to Dream is sung by the game’s final boss while the end credits roll. After being defeated, Skullmageddon finds himself in a state of free fall and decides to bide his time by belting out a power ballad. The song is a remixed version of the main Double Dragon theme, but the composition is infused with dramatic rock opera vibes and killer guitar solos. (Skullmageddon’s voice was clearly inspired by Skeletor, which fits perfectly with the ’80s theme.) The song provides insight into Skullmageddon’s motivations, and the lyrics accentuate the absurdity of a magical skeleton singing a song as he falls to his apparent doom. For those who have never played Double Dragon, Dared to Dream acts as a great synopsis for the game.

The Great Mighty Poo is quite possibly the shittiest video game character of all time, but I mean that in the nicest way possible. Conker’s Bad Fur Day is famed for its use of scatalogical humor, and the Great Mighty Poo is perhaps the most notable example of this. With teeth of corn and the voice of an opera singer, the short-tempered boss of Poo Mountain throws shit at Conker and describes his actions through song. His tempo and pitch change with each stage of his attack, and this adds drama to the battle. Appropriately enough, he’s weak against toilet paper and is flushed away after being defeated. His voice sounds sophisticated, but his language is vulgar. He swears up a storm on the Nintendo 64, but some of the lyrics to his theme song were so crude that they were replaced with fart sounds in the Xbox remake. You read that correctly. An Nintendo 64 game was too crude for the Xbox.

The first rendition of Ashley’s Song (featured in WarioWare: Touched!) reminded me of Pinky & The Brain and it has only become more spectacular over time. The reason it’s so effective is that it tells you absolutely everything you need to know about the character. The WareWare games are light on story, but Ashley’s Song describes the young witch perfectly. Since Ashley sings part of the song herself, you can accurately gauge her personality just by the tone of her voice. It’s interesting to note that the lyrics to the song and Ashley’s personality are completely different in the Japanese and English versions of the game. In the Japanese version, she struggles to make friends because she’s shy. In the American version, she has a brash personality and threatens others as a means of coping with her loneliness. You better learn her name, cause it’s Ashley!

Still Alive is featured in the ending credits of Portal and sung from the perspective of the villainous GLaDOS following her defeat. The song is unusually cheerful and upbeat given the circumstances, and the over-the-top lyrics highlight GLaDOS’s passive aggressive nature. Even though she lost, GLaDOS spins her failure into a huge success and insists that she feels fantastic about what transpired. GLaDOS was the player’s adversary during the game, but she was also one of the most entertaining villains in gaming history. The games developers chose to play Still Alive during the credits as a way of ending things on a positive note. As songwriter Jonathan Coulton explained, hearing GLaDOS sing at the end of the game almost felt natural after becoming accustomed to her voice throughout the game. Still Alive also left the door open for a sequel, but that was just the icing on the cake.